Women !

2 blogs in a day. I must be bored. This blog is about one of the many non-male entities of this universe, some men defined as woman. (Woo Man). Some famous quotes about them.

When a man steals your wife, there is no better revenge than to let him keep her -- David Bissonette.

After marriage, husband and wife become two sides of a coin; they just can't face each other, but still they stay together -- Sacha Guitry.

By all means, marry. If you get a good wife, you'll be happy. If you get a bad one, you'll be a philosopher -- Socrates.

Woman inspires us to great things, and prevents us from achieving them.

The great question... which I have not been able to answer... is, 'What does a woman want?' -- Dumas

I had some words with my wife, and she had some paragraphs with me -- Sigmund Freud.

Some people ask the secret of our long marriage.. We take time to go to a restaurant two times a week. A little candlelight dinner, soft music and dancing. She goes Tuesdays, I go Fridays -- Anonymous.

There is a way of transferring funds that is even faster than electronic banking. It's called marriage -- Sam Kinison.

I've had bad luck with both my wives. The first one left me, and the other didn't -- James Holt McGavran

Two secrets to keep your marriage brimming - 1. Whenever you're wrong, admit it 2. Whenever you're right, shut up -- Patrick Murray.

The most effective way to remember your wife's birthday is to forget it once -- Nash.

You know what I did before I married? Everything I wanted to -- Anonymous.

My wife and I were happy for twenty years. Then we met -- Henry Youngman.

A good wife always forgives her husband when she's wrong -- Rodney Dangerfield.

A man inserted an 'ad' in the classifieds: 'Wife wanted'. Next day he received a hundred letters. They all said the same thing: 'You can have mine.' -- Anonymous.

First Guy (proudly): My wife's an angel.
Second Guy: Lucky you. My wife is still alive.

Be bachelors !

Funny one-liners

No reason. Just feeling bored. So, here you go.

-- Love thy neighbor...but don't get caught!
-- Save Water ! Save Water ! Take a bath with your neighbor's daughter.
-- It's not fair, so little life and so many girls.
-- Beauty is in the eye of the beer holder.
-- Behind every great woman there is a man checking out her ass.
-- A friend with weed is a friend indeed.
-- Not all men are stupid . Some stay bachelors.
-- When everything's coming your way, you're in the wrong lane and going the wrong way.
-- You're so boring that even if you throw a boomerang, it won't come back to you.
-- Born free. Taxed to death.

-- Booze is the answer. I don't remember the question.
-- Whenever I find the key to success, someone changes the lock.
-- One man's folly is other man's wife.
-- Life is a bitch. Be a dog.
-- I don't speak French. But I do kiss that way.
-- Ladies first. Pretty ladies sooner.
-- Girls need a reason to have sex. Guys just need a place.
-- Gravity is a myth. Earth sucks.
-- Women are living proofs that humans exist without brains.
-- If at first you don’t succeed, destroy all evidence that you tried.

That's all for now. Adios !

Orkut's fortunes !

Hello guys, long since I've written something here. Well, blame the tight schedule of Man Utd. I ain't getting even one free weekend to jot down my thoughts.

I have a habit of pasting my Today's Fortune of my Orkut profile everyday into my scrapbook. Some of them are really funny and some are inspirational. Recently, I've noticed a trend of funny ones for some 10 days or so. Will share them below.

Nov 21: The guy who reads your fortune lost his psychic powers (and his job). We hope you are feeling lucky.

Nov 22: The guy who reads your fortune is not feeling well. We hope you are.

Nov 23: The guy who reads your fortune disappeared and our boss is furious. We hope you have a lucky day.

Nov 24: The guy who reads your fortune is sick. We wish you to stay healthy.

Nov 25: The guy who reads your fortune is getting married today. Please wish him good luck !.

Nov 26: The guy who reads your fortune was fired. Until we hire a new guy, go visit a friend's album.

Nov 27: The guy who reads your fortune is sleeping. Don't wake him up.

Nov 28: The guy who reads your fortune is stuck in traffic. Until he arrives here, go send someone a testimonial.

Nov 29: The guy who reads your fortune is on vacation. We don't know what to say... Go visit someone's profile.

Nov 30: The guy who reads your fortune went on strike. No cookie for you today. Go send someone a scrap.

Adios !